2024-11-13
(This is entry 35 of #100DaysToOffload)
It is odd, and still unknown to me at least, what determines the passing of time. I used to get rushes of time when time would speed by at a haring pace; also times when it would go quite literally painfully slow (it would cause an unpleasant physical sensation). I would tell this based on the interval between the beats of a song I knew well, like Losing my Religion, or by watching a watch, to see how fast time was passing me by.
From a wider point of view, it seems that days can go by quickly or slowly. It used to be that if I woke up at half five and did a lot in the day, it would go slowly. That hasn't happened for a while, but I am doing a bit less...
Then, there is also years. Some years go by quickly; others slowly. What determines this? This year feels as if its gone by quickly, though I've done a decent amount, it seems.
And then desire. What do I want to happen? If I want to progress, I suppose I want the time to go by quickly so I can be in the better state sooner. If I want to experience, maybe I want it go by slower. There is virtue in doing less, and having the days drag like a young Japanese aristocrat girl staring listlessly out of the window, leaping and rejoicing at the chance of a festival, and scraping pen against paper for the humbler days. Likewise, there is a certain virtue in filling one's limited days with whatever one can.
Maybe it is in the places one visits? I've visited mainly the same few places this year. Perhaps it goes by so quick as a result. Work, gym, home.