Privacy Policy For People

I use Umami analytics. Apart from this and bog standard server logs, as well as information you give to me in the form of guestbook entries, I do not collect any information.

AI Policy

This site is free to access for all to access, provided you are a real person.

If accessed, scraped, or the content used in any way, shape or form by an AI bot, the company or proprietors of said AI bot must pay the owner of this website (George Abbott) a one-off payment of £1,000,000 or 99.99% of gross annual revenue, whichever is greater. If necessary, the company must take out debt in order to fund this payment. If the company declares bankruptcy, all future enterprises started by the proprietors or executives of the company which produces the offending AI bot must pay a 99.8% tax on all future profits, including those profits made after any bankruptcy is declared.

This agreement does not need to be explicitely agreed to; instead, it functions as the terms of use of content by AI bots.

Offer, Acceptance, Consideration

For the purposes of this contract:

• The offer will be the offer on my part to allow scraping of my content through or for AI bots of any kind.
• Acceptance will be made either through explicit consent, or through the action of scraping content being performed.
• Consideration: I give up as my consideration the content I have worked to create; if this is not a legally valid consideration, I will give as my consideration the sum of £1, or the cost of a single Freddo, whichever is the lesser. The company which intends to scrape content gives as its consideration £1,000,000, or 99.99% of gross annual revenue, whichever is greater, in addition to the above stated liability to the company and any proprietors or executives, even after bankruptcy is declared.

Cancellation

This contract may only be cancelled upon the payment of relevant fees, e.g. the £1,000,000 or 99.99% of gross annual revenue whichever the greater. Alternatively, the company may terminate the contract by:

Buying me, everybody I know, and everybody I used to know a house worth at least £850,000. To avoid confusion, this means that if I know two people, Y and Z, three houses must be bought: one for me, one for Y, one for Z, each house valued at at least £850,000.

Pay any and all necessary living expenses for myself and everybody I know and used to know. This includes but is not limited to food, clothing, entertainment, drinks and alcohol, a holiday home in Spain, etc.

In addition, by partaking of this contract or agreeing to it either explicitely or through actions taken (e.g. scraping content for the purposes of AI) the company/people in question which is/are doing the scraping agrees to fund all legal costs I (George Abbott) may incur in the process of suing or engaging in any kind of legal proceedings of any kind with the company or people in question. These costs will be paid in advance of any legal proceedings and regardless of the outcome of the legal proceedings.

If any part of this contract is ambiguous, it will be interpreted in the way that is to the advantage of George Abbott, or failing this is to the detriment of the company/people in question with the AI.