2024-09-28
It's one of those days. I went to town to the cafe today as usual, and read a chapter and a half of Dawkin's Extended Phenotype as well as studying a few pages of the book in Italian (struggling to understand, but it'll come along). I had my usual cake, milkshakes, and falafel wrap. But I felt really tender.
Especially as I walked through town, I could feel my eyes were quite dry. I felt almost as if I could begin to cry at any point. In fact, I sort of want to be able to cry; of course, I am a man and so cannot. I really only cry at movies - perhaps I could benefit from a movie right now. I haven't seen the Studio Ghibli film that I was meant to watch this week. I should actually tick off all the SG movies, one by one - I have them downloaded. I could just watch them bit by bit. I'v enjoyed massively every single one I've seen so far, some more than others, of course.
I might well, actually. I'm just going to update on what's happening. I've pretty much been sat at home, in the garden a little, seen the cat, eaten four tomatoes (Golden Sunrise variety) and have swapped out the blue ink that runs very dry for the black ink. The reason being is that, one hopefully it will be a tad wetter (I think it's still quite dry, but it can't be as bad as the Faber Castell Cobalt Blue has been - I don't remember it being that dry when I first used it - maybe the paper) so hopefully the black (which is a - Christ, should I just add a page to the website detailling the pens and inks I use? It is a Waterman black) is a tad wetter. Actually, just tested it and it is much wetter. And two, to get to the actual point, I want to do #Inktober. Really I don't exactly know what inking is, rather, I just want to draw, sketch, and do so in ink. Or pencil, maybe. So the goal will be, one sketch (maybe in pencil first and ideally inked after) each day in October. Hopefully I can manage it.
I feel as if I'm sort of pushing myself too much in that I don't really know if I'll have the time for it. But it's coming to winter, and I need to keep myself busy, so it can't be all bad.
Still. I'm in a bad rut at the moment. I did want to go to the allotment, yet now I'm home I'm almost reluctant to. I know I ought to go; in fact, I also want to draw. I also now want to watch a movie. It's tough, because I feel as if I haven't enough time to do all I want to do. I have a proclivity at the moment to do as I am doing - casually, very slowly write this wv whilst watching Youtube videos. I know however if this lasts too long, then I will end up regretting the day - I have a hard limit as I have to go round to my grandma's at six (for a free dinner, woe is me) but I know I must not end up doing this the whole day. It's coming up to half past one, and so I've a little bit of time left - well, four hours. I think, I will watch a SG film, and will then get up and do some actual work, or draw something.
I don't really have much else to write at the moment. I've got the rest of the weeknotes to write, but I think I don't have much else to write there - I'll see tomorrow I guess. I ought to actually put it somewhere as a part of a regular schedule that I will write my weekly journal. Gym needs to be regularly scheduled as well (with some allowances for Wednesdays and Thursday which can be work-dos, and Monday which are for social times in the evening).
I wonder if I could make a schedule that accounts for contingencies... as in, that has built in redundancy etc. Could be fun?
I can't drag the words out on this one. I've not the will to write. Have a good one.